The art of sitting still

I could use a tutorial on the art of sitting still. I’m no good at it.

The last few weeks have reminded me that the person I am feels more comfortable when moving. I’ve come to realize that I sit quietly, without moving, only when I’m reading or watching a movie.

Unless the book hypnotizes me in the way of Pride and Prejudice and Where the Crawdads Sing, I reach my reading threshold at around 30-40-minutes. After that, I take a break to move and shake.

I’m a movie fan, true, but I can’t sit and watch films back-to-back-to-back. Movies on television are a bigger challenge. Commercials stretch two-hour movies to three-hour fiascos.

You are thinking, “Wait. You have to sit to eat. You have to be still to sleep.”

I appreciate your thoughts, but “No and no.”

When I eat, I move forks and spoons from my plate to my mouth—a little too often. And I’m not quiet. When my mouth is clear of food, I talk—a lot. Ask my husband. Gary is silent when he eats because he can’t manage to get a word between my diatribes.

Poor guy. When he promised to love, honor, and cherish, he did not realize he also pledged to live with my sleep noises.

I know I make sounds when I snooze because Gary’s elbow nudges tell me I do. He says I don’t snore, but that my lips purse together, and I “pa, pa, pa” puff as though I’m working to keep a feather floating in the air above me.

My husband doesn’t have to tell me that I don’t lay still when I sleep. I never wake in the position I start. My arms and legs beg me to shift if I remain in one spot too long. And my pillow is dented and smashed each morning as though it suffered a fierce battle.

When I’m forced to sit when dining out or attending celebrations that include dinner, I find a piece of paper, any size works. Paper napkins or the little square that enfolds cutlery or a gum wrapper will do. Though the latter has to come from a tablemate. I gave up chewing gum years ago.

I’ve always been proud of my multitasking skills. I am attentive and listen to those around me. At the same time, I fold the napkin or paper square or gum wrapper into triangular or rectangular shapes, sometimes constructing miniature paper accordions. Later, I find shapes and accordions in the bottom of a purse or in the corner of a jacket pocket.

More often than not, though, when at a quiet table, I use those bits of paper for what I’m really good at making:  paper airplanes. I make airplanes out of cocktail napkins, wedding programs, torn envelopes, and church programs (not good, I know).

It’s kind of like Green Eggs and Ham:

I make paper airplanes. I do.

I can make them in a pew. I can make them at a table.

Just hand me a napkin or a canned food label.

I know. I should leave clever rhyme schemes to Dr. Seuss. But when I have to sit quietly, paper airplanes are my thing. They are my thing because I am no good at sitting still.

Note that I am very careful after I turn paper into an airplane when I am seated at public places or events. When the folds of a plane crease in all the right spots, I picture it soaring through the air. I have to resist the temptation to let it fly.

Ok. I have launched a paper airplane or two or five in places where I should not have. But not from a pew. Cross my heart.


VievesVine View All →

writer, blogger, columnist

1 Comment Leave a comment

  1. Love this, Genny! I keep trying to reply “above the line” but I never can! Are you back? xxoo

    Sent from my iPhone



Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: